Mathematics Of The
Christian Faith (by Sogree)
Victor Gijsbers

Transparent Spacer

 

    • 12 billion years ago god created the Universe
    • 5 billion years ago he started with our Earth
    • 3 million years ago he started with humankind
    • 150,000 years ago he started with the current version of humankind
    • 5,000 years ago he revealed himself to humankind (so they say)
    • And for only 2,000 years he has been able to “enjoy” Christian people

    • On a timescale of the Universe (100 percent) the Earth has existed for 42 percent of the time
    • Apeman existed since 0.025 percent of the time
    • Humankind itself has existed for 0.00125 percent of the time
    • The Christian faith has existed for 0.000042 percent of the time (rounded upwards)
    • The time god has been able to enjoy Christian people is 0.000017 percent (rouded upwards).

Thus, god has, for 99,999982 percent of time (rounded downwards = 11,999,997,960 years), been bored, has done nothing. He has been waiting for us, only to leave us behind “alone” once again. Why? For eating an apple, that’s why! I know time is nothing to God, but this is preposterous.

Sogree,
Tweakers Discussion Forum,
Topic: Does god exist?,
Translated from Dutch by Victor Gijsbers

This piece was edited on 1 August 2004 by the original author to correct an error: what now reads “11,999,997,960” originally read “1,199,999,784,000” — a trifle long for the Universe to have existed, don’t you think?

 


Transparent Spacer

Graphic Rule

Material by Cliff Walker (including unsigned editorial commentary) is copyright ©1995-2006 by Cliff Walker. Each submission is copyrighted by its writer, who retains control of the work except that by submitting it to Positive Atheism, permission has been granted to use the material or an edited version: (1) on the Positive Atheism web site; (2) in Positive Atheism Magazine; (3) in subsequent works controlled by Cliff Walker or Positive Atheism Magazine (including published or posted compilations). Excerpts not exceeding 500 words are allowed provided the proper copyright notice is affixed. Other use requires permission; Positive Atheism will work to protect the rights of all who submit their writings to us.