James Danforth ["Dan"] ["Bambi"] Quayle (b. 1947)
US vice president under George Bush (1989-1993)

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle

I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy -- but that could change.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 5/22/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 9/15/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92, The New Yorker, 10/10/88, p.102)

This election is about who's going to be the next President of the United States!
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 9/2/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is "to be prepared."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 12/6/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

I had no problem communicating with Latin American heads of state -- though now I do wish I had paid more attention to Latin when I was in school.
-- Dan Quayle, quoted from Encarta Book of Quotations

If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, to the Phoenix Republican Forum, 3/23/90 (reported in Esquire, 8/92) Also reported by Reuters, 5/2/90

Let me just tell you how thrilling it really is, and how, what a challenge it is, because in 1988 the question is whether we're going forward to tomorrow or whether we're going to go past to the -- to the back!
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 8/17/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle winning friends while speaking to the United Negro College Fund, 5/9/89. This gem has been added to Bartlett's 'Familiar Quotations' and the Encarta Book of Quotations (reported in Esquire, 8/92) (reported in the NY Times, 12/9/92)

Mister Potatoe Head After 12-year-old student William Figueroa, far right, finished writing out the word potato during a spelling bee at the Luis Munoz Rivera School in Trenton, New Jersey, Vice President Dan Quayle, left, relying on a flash card, urged the youngster to add an e. "I knew he was wrong," said Figueroa later. "He probably feels embarrassed about that, probably mad a little bit ... but I hope he can take it." Time Magazine, June 29, 1992; photo by Michael Mancuso

Take a breath, Al ... Inhale.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle politely cutting off Senator Al Gore during the VP Debate in Atlanta, 10/13/92. Gov. Zell Miller of Georgia said that Dan Quayle reminded him of one of his grandkids when they've had too much sugar.

Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.
-- Senator Dan Quayle, US News and World Report (10/10/88)

Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, Hawaii, 4/25/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

Space is almost infinite. As a matter of fact we think it is infinite.
-- Dan Quayle, quoted from Encarta Book of Quotations

Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle addressing the 20th anniversary celebration of the moon landing, 7/20/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 8/11/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

The loss of life will be irreplaceable.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle after the San Francisco earthquake, 10/19/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

A stirring victory for the forces of aggression against lawlessness.
-- commenting on the Persian Gulf War, quoted from Encarta Book of Quotations

Bobby Knight told me this: "There is nothing that a good defense cannot beat a better offense." In other words a good offense wins.
-- Senator Dan Quayle, in a speech to the City Club of Chicago, comparing the offensive capabilities of the Warsaw Pact with the defensive system of NATO, 9/8/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

In the past we have tried too much to prevent the making of mistakes.
-- quoted in The Nation, November 9, 1992

The Civil War was the best war we've ever had because when you're fighting with yourself, you're always going to win.
-- Speaking to the American Legion (source unknown)

Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children. It is a unique profession and, by golly, I hope that when they go into the teaching field they do have that zeal and they do have that mission and they do believe in teaching our kids.
-- (source unknown)

 

That's the really neat thing about Dan Quayle, as you must have realized from the first moment you looked into those lovely blue eyes: impeachment insurance.
-- Barbara Ehrenreich, US author, columnist, The Worst Years of Our Lives, "My Reply to George" (1991; first published 1981), essay addressed to George Bush, quoted from The Columbia Dictionary of Quotations

Thanks to Michael Goldsman
for some but not all of these
-- goldsman@cc.gatech.edu

Some of these may not be real.
We didn't check too closely.
Just have fun with it, okay?

The Subtle Fulmination of the Encircled Sea

Please Feel Free
to Grab a Quote
(or Maybe Three)

Grab some quotes to embellish your web site,
to use as filler for your group's newsletter,
or to add force to your Letters to the Editor.

Use them to introduce the chapters of a book or
accent the index or margins of a special project.

Poster your wall!    Graffiti your (own) fence.
Sticker your car!!
Poster your wall.    Graffiti your (own) fence!!!

That's what this list is for!
That's why I made it!

In using this resource, however, keep in mind that
it's someone's life's work, a hedge against old age.

In other words: That is: In other words:
If you decide to build your own online
collection, then find some new material!
Dig up quips that haven't yet been posted!

There's something to be said
for doing your own work.